Friday, April 24, 2009

Sometimes Newborn Animals Just Get Lucky !

The animal world is not always predictable and sometimes strangers make good bedfellows. Such is the case of today's new arrivals who found themselves in need of a helping hand from another species.

Take, for example, the case of Finnegan the squirrel, who fell from his nest and was adopted. Now Finnegan does not yet know that he isn't a dog, but I'm sure that, in time, his adopted mom will let him know. In the interim, Finnegan will enjoys his newfound family.

Most adoptive animals are receptive to other types of animals, especially nursing mothers. You can usually slip a newborn animal in with a different type of species and the mother will nurse it. This is very fortunate for the little family of newborn skunks who were introduced to a receptive nursing cat, who took over the duties of motherhood. It is also fortunate for the little skunks that their scent glands don't develop until later.

Patience is a true virtue among animals and in the case of the white kitten who sought out a friendship with a large dog, patience is an understatement. Anyone who has ever had a kitten is aware of the havoc that they can create and the trouble they can get into. From the look on the face of the dog, it's obvious that the kitten has exceeded his bounds but the dog just takes it with a grain of salt.

Of course, dogs can nurture larger animals as is the case of the female dog who was very protective to a fawn who had lost it's mother. It's interesting to see that the dog is very aware of the photographer, yet the fawn sleeps without a care.

Then, there's the case of the fawn who was slipped into a litter of puppies and judging by the body language, the fawn does not yet know it is not a dog. Nature seems to have a way of giving a helping hand to newborn animals along with the very caring people who add their own particular touch as well.

It always makes me feel good to see that in some cases of lost or abandoned newborn animals, they can sometimes get that lucky break and live a happy life.

The Cat's Meow And Puppy Dog Tales:

A young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, "Your first job will be to sweep out the store." The young man said, "But I'm a college graduate." The manager said, "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that. Here, give me the broom - I'll show you how."

An unemployed guy goes door-to-door looking for work. One home-owner hands him a brush and a tin of paint and offers him $50 to paint his porch. A few hours later the guy goes to the home-owner and says, "I've finished!! but I reckon you should know your car's a Ferrari not a Porsche!"

Then, again, not every species is always lucky enough to find a nice adoptive family. Some families just enjoy dining out and do not want the responsiblilty of raising a family.

A circus owner walked into a shop to see everyone crowded around a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheelin' and dealin' they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot.

Three days later the circus owner runs back to the shop in anger, "Your duck is a rip-off! I put him on the pot before a whole audience and he didn't dance a single step!" The duck's former owner though and said, "Hmmm....Did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"

That's Possum's Journal for this week. Have a great weekend and more next week.

Stray Tuned !

Friday, April 17, 2009

They Shudda Considered A Cat !

You'd think that Barack Obama would be wise enough to get a cuddly kitten for the children, but noooooo..., he's gotta get some high-falutin' dog instead. I mean, really, the mutt's already gone through three or four families as it is. To make matters worse, the stupid media is falling all over itself with its non-stop coverage of "Bo this" and "Bo that." Granted, the pup's rather handsome as dogs go but sheesh.....! I can't wait until ol' Bo takes a healthy dump on the White House carpet. Then, we'll see how cool he is.

We cats, on the other hand, are careful to do our dooty privately and we take the time to cover it up after we're done. Have you ever seen a dog take a dump? I mean they just stop wherever the hell they are and let 'er rip. And taking a pee? They'll pee on anything, anywhere. Hell, they'll even pee on your leg.

You may say that I'm just jealous but I am not. It just bugs me that cats didn't get an equal opportunity to compete for the position. I even made a phone call to Al Sharpton and he told me it was because I'm partially black and that's racism.

One thing for sure though, they better check out Bo's background. Obama has already had a few nominees who had to withdraw their names because of background problems, especially taxes. I think they need to check Bo for drugs as well.

They will probably give Bo his own little White House to live in and I can guarantee you that it will turn it into a slum in a matter of months. Dogs are not well known for their grooming and housekeeping abilities. A cat, on the other hand, would maintain the residence clean and in good repair.

The bottom line is I can't wait to see the president walking or running with Bo and watch ol' Bo end up taking a pee or trying to hump one of the secret service agent's leg.

TheCat's Meow and Puppy Dog Tales:

A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for ham and bacon. After several weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, he only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs are pregnant. The vet tells him that when pregnant, they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the mud.

The farmer hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the pigs. So, he loads the pigs into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.

The morning after, he wakes and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, banged each pig twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes to find the pigs still standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the pigs, and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The following morning, he is woken up by his wife shaking him and saying, "Wake up Dear, the pigs are acting strangely!". The farmer says, "What do you mean? Are they wallowing in the mud?" His wife says, "No, they're all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn."

Just to show you things are not always what they may seem to be, I thought I'd show you Mount Rushmore National Monument, located near Keystone, North Dakota. It's a spectacular and moving granite sculpture by Gutzon Borglum which began on 1927 and ended in 1941. Besides the amount of work involved, including sculpting, blasting and labor, there are a few things that the average American cannot see. Here's what's really going on behind the scenes.

That's Possum's Journal for this week. Have a great weekend and more next week.

Stray Tuned !

Friday, April 10, 2009

There's Some Pet Shows That Are Just Flat Out Wrong !

Ok, I understand that some people overly dote on their pets and frankly, I like that idea. There comes a point in time, however, when some pet owners need to have their own family trees and breeding checked, as well. Take the case of these poodle owners who have taken dog competition to a whole new level.

These people definitely have too much time on their hands and should be taken back to the asylum that they escaped from. The poodles themselves have to be embarrassed as well. I mean, how can you hang out with your pals after the show looking like this? I guarantee you that you wont find any cats that will put up with this lunacy.

Pet Of The Week: Patches, who belongs to Helen's daughter, Mira, is home once again, safe and sound. It turns out Patches wandered away from her home and when Helen came to feed her, she was missing in action. Helen went looking for her and then her husband Ken had to go looking for Helen in the car. Once Ken found Helen, they located Patches in someone's yard with two other pooches. Patches was ecstatic to see Helen and Ken and is now home. Judging from her picture, I'd say it's business as usual.

There's been a lot of stories about people and animals in the news and many of my pals have sent me stories and pictures to share with you. Here are just a few of the ditties that I received from my pals and readers this week.

My pal, Linda sent me this picture of a cat who apparently is not overjoyed about being outside in the snow. From the look on it's face, I'm assuming the cat's thinking, "Uh...excuse me...You'd think at least one of my owners wouldn't be so senile as to forget I'm outside! Hey ! Murray ! Open the damned door... Murray? Marge?........"

Then, there's the case of a sign on a road that really shouldn't be there. It's designed to protect hikers and bikers from traffic but judging from the alternative, I think I'd just stay on the road and take my chances with the traffic. But that's just me.

I know this spot well. It's taken from a place called Shark Valley, a preserve located in the Florida Everglades off of Tamiami Trail. There's an observation tower there to see the flora and fauna of the Everglades, but as you can see, the tower really isn't necessary to see a few 'gators up close and personal.

The Cat's Meow And Puppy Dog Tales:

A man rear-ended a car in morning traffic. The two cars pulled over to the side of the road and slowly, both drivers got out. The driver of the rear-ended car was a dwarf and he stormed over to the driver of the car who hit him, looked up and yelled, "I Am Not Happy!" The driver of the second car looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian? Look, he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."

Just then the Indian looks up and says. "Covered wagon, about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon." The cowboy to his friend, "This is incredible! He knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. That's amazing!"

The cowboy says to the Indian, "Tell me, how are you able to know so much about the covered wagon and it's occupants. The Indian looks up and says, "Wagon ran over me about a half hour ago."

That's Possum's Journal for this week. Have a Happy Ester and a great weekend. More next week.

Stray Tuned !

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Friday, April 3, 2009

Memories Of My First Trip To The Vet And Why I Almost Became An Alcoholic

I remember my first trip to the cat doctor like it was yesterday and I still get the shakes when I think about it. My memories of being a kitten are somewhat vague, but suffice to say I remember those days of innocence...running, playing, hiding from Jimmy...good times!

One day, I was about to have the house to myself as Jimmy was going to work. I look over and saw this neat little box sitting by the front door. So, I went inside it and started playing, but that got old after five minutes. Then, I got up on the sofa for a catnap as Jimmy came over to give me my morning pat on the head.

All of a sudden he picks me up, puts me in the little house and closes the door. I'm thinking, "Hey, what's going on here?" The next thing I know, the little house goes outside with me in it and they put me in a car. I thought, "Now what?" I wondered where we were going? Maybe we were going to that place that they take that stupid mutt next door for something called 'stud purposes.' " That flea bag always comes back all happy with a stupid grin on his face.

Well, we go to another place and they take me and the little house inside. There's all kinds of people and critters in a little room, most of them ugly dogs. So there I sit, bored in the little house and a person in a white coat comes out. Jimmy picks me up and we go to another room.

In comes a big man with a white coat and Jimmy lets me out of the little house and pets me. White coat guy then starts touching me too and then he touches my tail. Now, I don't like anyone touching my tail, so I'm getting a little miffed. All of a sudden, I feel something very cold being inserted into the southern end of my body and I don't like first.

About the time I was getting accustomed to the cold thing, white coat guy removes it and grabs me by the back of my neck. I'm thinking, "The last time I grabbed a cat by the back of her neck, I had a plan." I'm starting to get pissed and possibly screwed and then white coat guy sticks something sharp into my fur. I'm thinking, "Check, please" because I'm getting ready to bolt.

Well, Jimmy leaves me with the white coat guy, who then leaves the room and turns out the light. The next thing I know, I wake up in another little house with pain coming from that same southern area where white coat guy was checking my oil.

So, take it from me folks, if anyone asks you to go out, make sure they don't have that little house in their hand or you may end up singing soprano in the choir.

Pet Of The Week: My pal Julie had a case of the stomach flu this week and to make matters worse, she's missed some work as well. Her dog Zoey got her shots this week and Zoey's been feeling a little punky as well. Julie says Zoey has put on a little weight this winter and she needs to lose about ten pounds. Personally, Zoey's one of my favorite pals and I think she looks nice anyway. Stop by and say hello to Julie and Zoey at Julia's New Journal. Here's the link:

The Cat's Meow And Puppy Dog Tales:

On this morning a woman and her baby were taking a bus. As she entered the bus the driver says "Wow that is one ugly baby." The woman deeply hurt just continued on the bus and found a seat next to an elderly man.

The man asks "What's wrong, you look mad?" She replied "I am. That bus driver just insulted me." The man says, "You shouldn't take that from him. He's a public worker and should give you respect. If I was you I would take down his badge number and report him.

The woman says, "You're right sir. I think I will report him." The elderly man says, "You go on up there and get his badge number and I'll hold your monkey for you."A blind rabbit and a blind snake meet each other. Neither one remembers what kind of animal they are, so they decide to feel each other. The rabbit says, "You feel me first." The snake says okay, and he starts feeling the rabbit. He says, "Well, you have fur all over, and a little cotton tail, and two long ears, and big back feet..." The rabbit says, "I know! I'm a rabbit! Yippee!"

Then the rabbit feels the snake. He says, "Okay, you're long and thin, and slimy all over, and there's a little forked tongue..." The snake says, "Oh no, I'm a lawyer."

A vet gets a midnight phone call from a farmer. "I`ve got a very constipated cow. It`s in great pain, what can I do?" The sleepy vet, tired after working all day says, "If you`ve got one of those small bottles of highly concentrated milk of magnesia, get that down it and I`ll call you in the morning to see how it is."

The next morning the vet calls, "How`s the constipated cow this morning?" The farmer. "Cow? I said cat." The vet says, "Oh Lord, did you give it the concentrate?" The farmer says, "Yes, I got the whole bottleful down its throat, I used a small funnel." The vet says, "Oh no, how is the cat?" The farmer says, "It`s out in the garden."

The vet says, "I'm so sorry, did he die?" The farmer, "No, but it`s out there with four of his friends.....two digging and two filling in."

That's Possum's Journal for this week. Have a great weekend and more next week.

Stray Tuned !